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Article By Jack Roller

From Wrestling USA Magazine October 1998

Guard or Guide

A Critical Choice For All Parents!

Should we guard our children against all evil at all cost? Is that part of a parent's job title as well as the obligation of raising children? Or consider this. Does it make more sense to guide our children by example? Those are questions I feel all parents should ponder.

This writer is by no means an expert on child rearing, however, after four sons and twenty-seven years I do have an opinion. I believe each child is a gift from God and is the ultimate blessing. Raising that child is a privilege as well as an obligation. Yes, most of us make mistakes with our first child and we learn with the others as well as our own maturity and we do become better parents. Being young and so caught up in making a living, we have very little quality time to spend with our families. This makes it even harder to guide. When you were young and beginning to crawl, what did your parents do? After the initial thrill of those first few inches you wobb- led, your parents began to guard you against all those household dangers. They had to stop you again and again from put ting those objects in your mouth, pulling things over on yourself, electrical sockets, etc. In other words they guarded you from that day on against all the evils of the world. You know one of the main things that makes it so hard to guard a child is that each one of them is twice a baby. You see, a baby can't always understand when you tell them not to touch or do that or they will get burned! They do not understand anymore than that teenager, that gives you that blank look, thinking you being as old as you are couldn't possibly understand what is right or wrong for me. Most of these teenage babies forget that many years ago we too were young and experienced many of the same problems that they are now facing. In the mid 60s when I was a young man, it seems that all my problems were girl related and believe me, at that time they were major ones. Every fight or argument was girl related. I guess those problems still exist; however, they are minor compared to todays problems. Today our youth have to go to school with gangs, drug dealers, and drug users. Our children have to worry about getting shot during recess or maybe someone putting something in their drink. What a change thirty years has brought! When I graduated in 1966, I had never seen drugs and barely heard of them. I felt that only the scankiest, lowest form of life would do drugs. Today, that opinion has not changed except in one way. The lowest form of life on Earth is not that snake in the grass but it is the drug dealer (middle man) and his source, the one who pulls that puppet's strings. They hook our precious gifts from God on their filthy habit. I'm sorry to preach but I just can't understand how we Americans can turn our back much longer on the cancer (drugs) that is destroying us from within our youth!

Now tell me how can a parent guard his children from drugs? I guess we can resurrect John Wayne and General Patton and maybe con Sly Stalone and Claude Van Damme into fighting our war for us against all the homemade labs, imported drugs, fields of drugs, the dealers, pushers and corrupt officers and judges, etc. Can we kill them all? No way! Can we make a difference? Maybe! The key question is ... Can we guard our babies against the utmost evils of the world? No way! You see, the law prohibits us from locking them in their closets until they reach an age of reasoning .... 25 years or so. Something is definitely wrong with a legal system that protects the rights of those snakes that ruin the lives of so many children. These profiteering pushers walk the streets free while first time offenders, kids which have been conned, are locked away.

Our only hope is to guide our children by example. Yes, we hope there is truth in that old saying, "Little Johnny is following in your footsteps". Or do we really hope our children are following our guidelines. I know of younger friends (a different generation) which have said it's okay to take that chew of tobacco or smoke a joint of marijuana in front of their children or even share it with them as they believe it should be legalized anyway. Recently I heard that a mother wanted to be a friend with her teenage son so she bought a keg of beer and left home so he and his other fifteen year old buddies could have a party. This is the kind of friend that will someday wonder why her son is an alcoholic or even worse he is not with us anymore.

Be careful if you choose to guide as we have tried to do. They watch every move you make. You can't choose your kids friends, but you can choose yours and the people that are around them at home. Expose your children to church, sports, and family meals. How often each week do you sit down to a meal with your whole family? This is a quality time you should demand!

In summary, I still say it is impossible to guard them at older ages. So in my opinion, you must guide your children into adulthood. If there is a need, improve your own actions before you guide them. I say that if your children are not important enough to do this for then you too are probably a lost cause. Let's guard while young and guide through life. I've heard it said there are two things that a species must do to survive and protect their young -- adapt and evolve with the changing times. Rebel! Do not adapt or evolve your lifestyle into today's times. I certainly hope that the majority of us never accept or respect the rights of drug dealers or gay rights activists. Can I ever understand a society where an entire city flies gay flags for a week in honor of their corrupt beliefs? Not no, but hell no! These are things that each of you should think about before you bring another precious life into this world.

Will you ever be able to protect or shelter them from the national media, etc.? No way! For now let's pray and keep the kids involved in sports and just maybe someday we can make a difference. My theory of guarding first and guiding later is much simpler.